For example: On the ice I have to be 100% honest with coaches about how I feel. There are times I am not...especially last week when I over pushed and still feeling it over a week later. However it is getting better.
Today I was trying a high paced sprint type movements as a test to see how my body reacted. Basically jumps and spins on the ice. Not only can I not feel 90% of my body...except my head that was hurting earlier...it felt like my legs weighed 1000 pounds each. They did not want to move. I could not feel where the pressure on my skates were either.
I was jumping and in the middle of the session I had to ask my coach to stop. It was not going anywhere and I felt like if I kept pushing I would end up hurting myself...and I have already had enough injuries to last me a lifetime.
Now I am usually okay with answering questions on my health but I find it really uncomfortable to do so, especially when doctors are still trying to figure out what the hell I am going through.
But one question I was asked earlier was about the electro machine I normally use to control the Fibro. I always use it when I am in pain. Truth be told. I was at the doctor a few weeks ago with extremely sore breasts. My doctor sent me for a breast ultrasound and the week leading up to it I was an emotional wreck. I thought something had gone wrong and the pain started when I was using the machine **though I only used it on my legs**. Ultrasound showed nothing (good news) but still has me worrying for the future. But after the week I have had I may need to rethink on using it again.
Another uncomfortable moment was admitting my eating disorder to someone. I have kept it quiet for years and I know I need help but this is something I really hate talking to people about. Even now. But when the time is right I will talk about it.
Sleep has been decent by the way. Especially after last week. I have been sleeping about 8 hours a night. Averaging 2-3 times getting up to pee in those eight hours. But the bad thing is they are between 1am-9am. To get a good nights sleep it is recommended to be in bed by 10 (with no electronics around) and to sleep about 10 hours. Between 2-4 am is when the deep sleep happens and when you wake up you should feel more refreshed then if you went to bed later on or slept with electronics.